Perfectionist?

1 Kings 15:3

He committed all the sins his father had done before him; his heart was not fully devoted to the LORD his God, as the heart of David his forefather had been.

For the longest time, I consider myself a good teacher. I was vibrant, creative, resourceful, and loving to the kids. WAS.  Homeschooling challenged that esteem. With my own kids, I get so drained, I feel irrelevant, and yes, I am losing my temper.  Every parent wishes to see their kids do their best. But my frustration springs from the unreasonable expectation for perfection. Sometimes I forget they’re just five and three. That those wiggly letters are already their improved scribbles and that blue apples are two separate words they can now identify. If only I’d just take Meriam-Webster’s definition of perfect as ‘corresponding to ideal standard’ instead of the idea of being ‘flawless’, then given my kids’ age, effort and enthusiasm, I think they’re just perfect :>

Our featured king today is Abijah, Rehoboam’s son. He only reigned three years and with only eight verses allotted to him in this book, we read this description: his heart was not ‘fully’ devoted to God, as David had been. Fast forward to the reign of his son Asa, in verse 14 of the same chapter, we’ll find this: ‘although he did not remove the high places, Asa’s heart was fully committed to the Lord all his life.’ The original word used was ‘shalem’ meaning complete or perfect. Wait. Perfect? Asa wasn’t flawless. David was not sinless either. But their hearts was perfect before God? It took me awhile to grasp this. Then I noticed shalem sounds like shalom, meaning peace. When I checked it again, yup, ‘shalem’ means at peace with God. Then I came across another perfect word, mature. One verse written was in the context of perseverance. Then I think I understand. A heart fully devoted to God is committing yourself to run His event, pushing all limits, with an eye to finish the race. We may fall like David or have backlogs like Asa, but unlike Abijah, they did not change course. They were committed to the one and only God.

I’m sure we all have frustrating seasons of imperfections. We share Elijah’s depression and hopelessness especially coming from that mountaintop experience. All the passion and promises to faithfully go and serve last week in a snap turned to so hating ourselves today because of that one covetous glance, one selfish lie, one thoughtless act. There were many times I wished the ground would just swallow me alive. Sin disrupts us momentarily. But should it stop us entirely? Flawlessness will say we’re disqualified, unworthy. Because we are. We can never be perfect. Our sins will block that peace. Praise God for grace. In Jesus, God sees us guiltless, blameless, sinless. He qualifies us and so we can keep on running and in the process achieve maturity, completeness, and be like Christ. So are we perfect? Yes, at peace with God. Perfect? Yes, getting there. Perfect? We’re justified :>