Who's Deciding For You?

2 Samuel 14:21

“The king said to Joab, ‘Very well, I will do it. Go, bring back the young man Absalom.”

Are women really fickle-minded? That we say one thing and in a second does another thing differently? That we are so ruled by our emotions? That we’re so indecisive, unpredictable and unreasonable? We go to a department store and exhaust all its racks for hours for the right shade, the exact size, the best deal possible and yes, still go home without a buy. We agree to a date but would readily cancel it for a pimple pop or a hairdryer malfunction, haha :>

Tris sometimes gets irritated, oftentimes amused, whenever he gives me the floor to decide where to eat and what to order and I’d make a total shift, mood included, at his slightest comment or suggestion - - which I solicited by the way. Yes, we can get away with it. But it doesn’t mean we’re right.

Joab’s scheme to bring the banished Absalom back to Jerusalem was successful. He used a witty, wise woman of Tekoah to pretend as a widow and persuade the king to give his word of protection for his treacherous son. He knew how David longed for his son and he worked around that affection to manipulate him to a decision. What pushed David more was the argument that it was God who allowed Absalom to continue to live, despite his sins, meaning mercy is still applicable to him. Joab further added it was also the pulse of the people to have this handsome young man around. And so David gave his order to fetch his son from Geshur. But he did not let him come to him. The law has been clear about murder. In not serving justice, David had to make it appear he’s not blind to his son’s crime. But even if he’s sincere in teaching his son a lesson here, there was no mention that he inquired of the Lord for HIS, not his, decision. God has already given his piece to them. David could have at least begged Him for pardon and mercy. It wasn’t his call. Not even the king was above God’s law. The chapter ended with David giving in again to Joab’s word, who was himself trapped in Absalom’s wishes. Now ungrounded and grip-loosened, David himself paved the way for the soon conspiracy of his son.

In arriving at a decision, who’s voice sound loudest to you? David consulted his feelings, and it felt right. He interpreted the situation, and it looked logical enough. He listened to the people, and they sounded… majority. He forgot Who dictates it all. He lost grip of God’s standard and so was easily swept by the dictates of everyone, including himself. We all are, not just women, indecisive, unpredictable and unreasonable because we are limited. We want but we don’t know what’s best for us. That’s why He gave us His Word and His Spirit to guide us. That’s why He invites us to a relationship with Him. That’s why we have to pray. Yes, we can choose to get away with life without Him. But we’ll never make it right. He alone can.  

Your Choice

2 Samuel 13:32

“But Jonadab son of Shimeah, David’s brother, said, ‘My lord should not think that they killed all the princes; only Amnon is dead. This has been Absalom’s expressed intention ever since the day Amnon raped his sister Tamar.”

I do have lazy days. Sometimes a treat after a full week, and sometimes just to break free from responsibilities. It’s my rebellious ME-times. Sleep indulgence, zero-nutrient meals, plates piled up, cityville for hours, messed house, kids watching tv all day, and no one takes a bath, hahaha!! And usually when the clock strikes 5pm, I rush around to patch things up in prep for my husband’s coming home from work. I’d feel guilty, unnecessarily stressed and overly disappointed. So different when I choose discipline. I’d start early with God’s word, prepare the house for the day, write this blog, spend quality time with my kids in homeschooling and supervised dvd watching, facebook peeks and play during lunchhour, attend to my curriculum writing assignment while the kids take their naps in the afternoon, prepare myself and the house for our family nights, and end the day thanking God for a full day. The obvious difference was how I chose to start my days: God or Me.

God orchestrated that I start this week with this chapter. Holy Week is meant for us to remember His death because of our sins, and David’s family life here was experiencing death because of sins as well. His son Amnon raped his half-sister Tamar, and Absalom had him pay for it with his life. In both instances, they used their unsuspecting father as accessory to their crimes. This royal family’s downfall started with that one night stand with Bathsheba. ‘The sword will never depart from your house’ was God’s judgment. David’s sin weakened his hold to discipline his sons. And so Amnon fell in the same snare. He lusted over his beautiful sister and was deaf to her pleadings, disregarding his, her and the family’s honor, and defiant of God and His law. Lust proved unsatisfying and it did cost Amnon his life. To think he could have been next in throne. What a foolish exchange! Absalom took another route. He did not make one loud flare up. Instead he chose to nurse his seemingly no-big-deal bitterness for two years until it grew to his brother’s murder, making him flee and be far from his family and all royalty for three years. Maybe he was hoping his father would exercise justice. To God’s grief too, he did not. In not choosing discipline, by default, David brought death to his sons. What a fatal exchange :<

John 10:10 reads, ‘The thief only comes to steal and kill and destroy; I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.’ If there’s one visitor you’ll welcome into your home, who will you choose, the thief or Jesus? We all knew how sin will ruin our lives: illicit relationships, disobedience to parents, insubordination to our leaders, lying to our friends, even laziness at home. But how come we still choose to be blinded with its temporal, deceitful pleasures? Is it worth exchanging our peace, joy, family, and integrity with? We do have a choice. Everyday. Forgiveness or Bitterness? Repentance or Rebellion? God or Ourselves? Life or Death? I pray we all take time this week to reflect on our choices and His. The Cross was a choice. He died that we might live. Isn't a full life with Him better than sin's empty offer? What's your choice.

Hate the Sin!

2 Samuel 12:13-14

“Then David said to Nathan, ‘I have sinned against the Lord.’ Nathan replied, ‘The Lord has taken away your sin. You are not going to die. But because by doing this you have made the enemies of the Lord show utter contempt, the son born to you will die.”

My firstborn son knows that whenever he stepped off the line, he will receive a spank. Then we’ll talk about what happened, I’ll ask him to say ‘sorry’, and we’ll end with the reaffirming hugs. It was quite working well. Until my little girl disrupted the pattern. As soon as she realize I’m on my way for the discipline, she’ll run to me with her tight little hug and sweet sounding ‘sorry mom’ - - many times over. I have to confess my heart did a lot of meltdowns and broken rods. I know what you’re thinking. High time to think it through. And God just said today is the day.

Here’s what happened: David sinned, Nathan rebuked him, David repented, God forgave, punishment was laid down, David begged, still the child died, David got up, God gave another child. Here’s what a soft mom like me usually see: he repented of the sin, he knew the lesson, he begged not to do it again - - therefore I forgive and forget.  Here’s what God has to say: I will forgive because you repented, but I will still punish because you sinned. That is why Jesus had to pay the penalty for our sins. He had to serve God’s justice. David’s sin created a foothold for the enemy to scorn the name of God. A child’s disobedience challenges God’s wise order and righteous character. Withholding the discipline weakens his ground, making him more insecure than loved. Here’s a wise ruling: always forgive the child, and always punish the sin. They have to see it separate, but both dealt with.

The March 12 incident in Willing Willie where a six year old boy was repeatedly asked to perform a stripper dance created a viral noise in the internet, compelling government agencies to make a move, advertisers to pull out, even international anti-child abuse advocates to rally and push for tougher laws. Heated discussions on the hosts unreprimanded issues in the past resulted to his further abuse of the stage. Another point of concern is the how the parent’s tolerance of the issue has created a distorted concept of morality for the child. This is one loud picture where apologies will not suffice. We have to forgive the sinners, but the sin has to be dealt with. We have to push it. It is a scorn to God’s righteous rule not to.  

Enough Is Enough

2 Samuel 12:8,9a

“I gave your master’s wives house to you, and your master’s wives into your arms. I gave you the house of Israel and Judah. And if all this had been too little, I would have given you more. Why did you despise the word of the Lord by doing what is evil in his eyes?”

My two year old little girl loves to eat. Every morning when she wakes up, even with eyes still half-closed, her feet will bring her to the table asking for milk and ‘eat’. Many times during the day, in between her one toy to the next, she’ll ask for some cookies. If I’ll say there’s none, she’ll run down a list of other possible to-munch like ‘bwed’, ‘koleyt’, ‘ships’, ‘doodles’ then back to cookies again. During mealtimes, even when her plate is still four to five spoonfuls to finish, she’ll call out ‘more ha, mom’. If I say, ‘that’s your last’, she’ll readily blurt out ‘bwed?’ Hahaha. It’s hard to resist her charms. But sometimes I just have to say ‘No’ to for her to understand schedules and satisfaction and to mind our savings of course, haha. Enough is enough.

God has given David more than enough. He acquired all of Saul’s power and possessions, that is, the whole country and his whole house. Everything at his disposal. What else could he need? He even had his own wives and concubines to begin with. Not that God approved of it of course. It was David’s choice. But just like Adam and Eve, having a perfect garden doesn’t guarantee satisfaction. Covetousness will always tempt us to crave for more, even those not rightfully ours to take and taste. The prophet Nathan pictured it as a rich man taking the one ewe lamb that belonged to the poor man. It has no regard for others. A spoiled brat playing deaf ears to any reasoning. Worse than poverty is greed. Excuses might be found for a thief who steals because he is starving, but what excuses does an adulterer have? God said, “If all this had been too little, I would have given you more.” It is not just unsatisfying, but an insult to provide for ourselves elsewhere. His kingdom operates on a relationship that we receive from His table. We ask and He gives. For how can we give praise if it’s not coming from His hand? How dare we imply that His best is wanting when we never find time to ask Him to fully satisfy us? Is it really not enough or we’re just not looking enough?

God has given us more than we could ask or imagine. Stop looking at the our neighbor's fence on how they may seem to be more blessed than us. They may just be differently blessed, or they could have sought more. James 4 says ‘We do not have because we do not ask’. Even if David did ask for Bathsheba, he will not receive, because it is on a wrong motive. God as a parent delights to satisfy our cravings. But He will say No when it will do us more harm that good. Enough is enough.

David as DiCaprio

2 Samuel 11:14,15

“In the morning David wrote a letter to Joab and sent it with Uriah. In it he wrote, ‘Put Uriah in the front line where fighting is the fiercest. Then withdraw from him so he will be struck down and die.”

In the 2010 movie Inception, the wife of Di Caprio’s character Dom Cobb, jumped out of a window because she thought the reality she lives in was still a limbo and only death again can break her free. Since it was Dom who performed inception on her, he feels he’s the cause of her death. Since then, she manifested in all his deliberate dreams, a threat disrupting his missions, the guilt deep down his level five subconscious. Face to face with his dark shadow was a choice, either deceive himself to a happy ending, or forgive himself and live the painful truth. I wish the wobbles of his totem meant it fell over after the black screen. Otherwise, we can expect Inception 2.

David was himself in a multilayered state here. His one-night-stand with Bathsheba created a series of schemes that brought him deep down with his deceits. The first layer was Uriah’s pull out. It was a lame script for David to ask this guy how the soldiers were. Lamer to send a gift after him. No wonder Uriah did not buy his urging to go home. The second layer was a drinking session with Uriah. David was here the chemist concocting a sedative to stabilize the situation. Like many people, he thought alcohol could make people forget thus solving their problems. What David failed to remember was that it he who did the implant to his soldiers to keep themselves from women in time of war. The third level was desperate. Joab was sure wide eyed in disbelief receiving a note, handed by Uriah himself, for a sabotage. He who kept his hands from slaying the guilty Saul was now giving an order for the murder of one innocent, offended man. His totem was spinning at the end, and he doesn’t even care. Israel’s dream king was living a nightmare.

The dreamers in Inception have a system of ‘kicks’ for them to wake up to reality. God did provide kicks for David to surface back. He gave Uriah the code of war script to remind David of his responsibility, and twice did He cause Bathsheba’s husband to sleep at the palace entrance to refer that his army are camped in tents. God will not give up on us even at our darkest nights. His faithfulness is committed to show us the way back.  Our guilt may lead us further down but God is still there to offer us a choice: a  happy-ending-dream-state lie, or His forgiveness amidst the painful truth. I wish you'll choose to make your totem fall over after that black screen. Post-credits scene will surely show God running to welcome you home. Part 2 would be your story anew. Time to wake up now :>

Hats On

2 Samuel 11:1

“In the spring, at the time when kings go off to war, David sent Joab out with the king’s men and the whole Israelite army. They destroyed the Ammonites and besieged Rabbah. But David remained in Jerusalem.”   

I can’t believe I finally had a working weekend! I know it may seem odd to most of you who usually have you work on weekdays and rest on weekends, but for people like me who literally grew up in church, it’s always the other way around. Moving to Cebu felt like living in another time zone where I had to adjust my body clock, to zero, haha. There were no choir rehearsals, no program meetings, no workshop teachings - - nothing on my usually-filled-up-schedule. It was homecoming to be in a room of vibrant volunteers. Deadlines, duties, delegation, demands, even stressful lines like ‘what happened?’, ‘who’s in charge of that?’, ‘where are they?’ welcomed me too. It’s good to have my hat back. I’m just so God-grateful :>

The opening lines of this chapter is quite an odd picture of David too. We've always known David for leading his men, or winning this war. I can’t remember ever reading David enjoying spring break, or David and his lazy walk in the rooftop. It was so unlike him. Worse, so unlike for a king. It was clearly his hat to fight against Israel’s enemies, to keep the plunder for the temple project, to extend their land borders. It was his wiring, his training, his calling. If the palace just needs a king seated on the throne, even Mephibosheth could do it. There was no mention of any pressing need in Jerusalem for him to stay. Joab’s ability to lead is not enough reason for him to delegate either. It was his hat. It was the purpose of his crown. But he turned it the other way around. He was that day the man after his own heart.

Each one of us has been designed distinctly for His purposes. Our personality, experiences, education, and expertise are all God-ordained to work in harmony to His will. And it is only in a relationship with Him we can find meaning to our hats. Turning off that connection is allowing other frequencies to broadcast. They’ll not sound bad. What’s wrong with spring break? But in time of war? What’s wrong with social networking. But during office hours? Nothing wrong with soaps or psps. But all day? Nothing wrong with traveling. But if you’re Jonah and God said towards Niniveh, other routes will lead you to a fish belly. David’s downfall is next. Be sure what you’re doing now is what you should be doing, not what you feel like doing. Ours is the hat, God holds the crown. We don't mix-'n-match. It’s not our call. It has always been His.

Band of Sisters

2 Samuel 10:11-12

“Joab said, ‘If the Arameans are too strong for me, then you are come to my rescue; but if the Ammonites are too strong for you, then I will come and rescue you. Be strong and let us fight bravely for our people and the cities of our God. The Lord will do what is good in His sight.”

My sister’s growing up years was around the time I was dorm-based. That’s more or less missing a thousand days for five years.  When finally I was settled back home, it was her turn to move out. Guess what happened after she decided to quit that school? I got married.  Six years after, that’s today, we’re again miles apart. Seas apart to be exact. Ironically, this is our closest relationship ever. I never cared for her as much as I do now. Never prayed for her as often as I do now. Can’t even remember telling her ‘I love you’ before. But I do now. And I feel so loved as well. Her stories eased my lonely first days here and her crazy laughters revived mine. Sadly, her side turned most raging and so rough these past few weeks. My shift has come to give her needed lift. I know the Lord will do what is good in His sight.

When Nahash, king of the Ammonites died, David sent a delegation to express his sympathy to Hanun concerning his father. But instead of gratitude, they were falsely accused as spies, their beards half-shaved, their garments cut off in the middle at the buttocks, and they were sent away greatly humiliated. It sure did provoke a war with Israel and these challengers even hired thirty-three thousand more men to fight alongside them. Seeing the battle lines infront and behind him, Joab, David’s general, knew it will be a hard fight for them. His strategy was to divide the task with his brother and to look after each other for emergency assistance. He never said he’d be all-strong for him. In humility and truth, he admitted he too could be needing Abishai’s strength. His speech reverbed ‘for Israel and for God’, but he opened up the stage for God to make His final statements. It was the plan of his heart, but he also gave his brother the perspective that it is still the Lord’s purposes that will prevail: ‘I know that Lord will do what is good in His sight.’ It is the confidence that the Lord will act upon His goodness. Win or lose, God will have the glory.

I found myself lost for words at the second blow of my sister’s path downhill. The battle was just too strong for the family, and even without a personal struggle to wage war with, I felt my full strength was already drained and the connecting tunnel was growing thin. Not even those ‘band of brothers’ could guarantee safety for each other. But there is one Strength we can run to. The One greater than our enemy’s intimidating chariots and swift horses. He gives power to the faint and to him who has no might He increases strength. A sufficient grace, a power made perfect in weakness. I may slumber and stumble but God is ever watchful to my sister. The Lord will do what is good in His sight. I know.